Anniversary July 19th

I saw your picture on the internet.

I looked you up, to see that you hadn't passed away.

I was surprised you let them write about you.

It's like a "Fuck you" in your own way

I'm angry.

The ending just happened. It came in the night and put walls around you, leaving the smallest crack where I could talk to you, me thinking we still had a chance. But then you sealed that off, too.

And you expected me to be okay with it. To not care that I was alone again, without my best friend, my universal love. You wanted me to go on and pretend like you had always been just a friend.

Just someone who shared the same humor.

To get out, you made me wrong, dangerous even. You made me your mother. Your evil mother.

I became the woman who was hurting you. Me and my vulnerabilities glaring in your face, your closed off heart, your own.

So, it was our destiny. The whole of it. The meeting and the now. The complete separation. We were each other's doorway to separate hallways.

Happy Anniversary, T.

Copyright by Rachel Drews, 2013. All rights reserved. Any excerpts reproduced from this article should include links to the original.